It's 6:32 pm. So says my computer digitally generated clock. I wonder if Microsoft's gonna allow Windows users to change the number fonts on the system clock in future versions. It would be a dream come true, wouldn't it? It's 6:33 pm now. It was 5:33 pm when I decided to go edit something in my Blogger space allowed by the promising Google. I still can't believe it took me an hour to do that!! Where does time go?! Logged into this "space" that Microsoft, Google, Yahoo, IMDB, Altavista, Porn sites, torrent sites, MP3s, Kazaa-lite (assumable spyware-free), and the late Napster. How did we manage to enslave ourselves? I spend over nine hours at work everyday staring at a computer screen and still manage to find it "fun" to come back home and stare at another computer screen for hours and hours of presumed fun until I can no longer open my eyes… then turn to bed… and wake up in the morning wondering why oh why do my eyes hurt?!

I was okay back in 1997 when my only cyber possession was a hotmail email address that I only checked once every six months to find that it's been deactivated and that all of my incoming emails have been deleted by Microsoft - my master. How is it that I got addicted? Why do I feel the need to surf? Is it because I enjoy digitally chatting with my "cyber" buddies? Do I really enjoy receiving and sending text to… strangers? Are they even real? Is it possible that they're all ENCARTA wannabes assuming the personalities of non-existent people?... I quote Peter Steiner when I say that 'on the internet, nobody knows you're a dog'.

Funny… "The things that I want" by the Raven… C'est moi!! I read it again only to find that I forgot to mention that I WANT TO STAY LINKED ONLINE FOREVER!! Is that what we are? LINKED SUBCONSCIOUSLY?! Have I become just another URL? Another banner that links to a non-visited homepage waiting for some anonymous cyber addict to write their comment on the shit that I say?

Shop Online --> Use credit cards --> Bankruptcy. I log into the deep Amazons of the web to stare for hours everyday at the things that I want. I take my credit card out of my wallet and enter my 16 magic digits… and a month later stare in wonder at an overdue bank statement with a lot of dot coms and dot nets mentioned everywhere but on my heart.

Where do we go from there? I see a future with me calling up a friend over MSN messenger and asking them to meet me @ Digitally Enhanced Star Bucks. We reserve a table for two and get a confirmation email from the digital café. We order coffee; of course, at that day and age, the computer is linked to the kitchen… and when the coffee is good and ready an msn alert message displays on screen. Better what… a NUDGE… oh I HATE NUDGES. Ten years ago the only hate I felt was towards some kid who took my football when I was seven. Now we hate spyware. We hate viruses. We hate nudges. We hate Block-Checkers. We laugh alone at fwds. We fall in love with digitally assumed personalities. We chat with Encarta. We illegally download music and movies and software just because the market price is too high. We create anti-whatever websites. We type what we feel… and place the document in a shared folder… for cyber buddies to enjoy. I used to show and express the things I felt... prior to my cyber renaissance.

I have to clear my throat before I speak due to the fact that I only talk nine hours everyday… at work. I only "chat" for the rest of my day. My right palm is slightly pushed back in to mark the exact proportions of a "mouse"!! My brain… has a URL @blogspot.com now!

How long have I been online?!

It's 7:13 pm now. May 19, 2006. It's been almost nine years now since my cyber addiction began and I'm starting to wonder now… what does the offline world look like? With all my cyber buddies and blog spaces and illegal mp3s and illegal avis and bookmarks and links and links and links…

why do I feel so alone?!!

Posted by Яαgιи Яαvєи on Friday, May 19, 2006 at 5/19/2006 07:15:00 PM | Permalink