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    Яαgιи Яαvєи
    Cairo, Egypt
    Wanting people to listen, you can't just tap them on the shoulder anymore. You have to hit them with a sledgehammer, and then you'll notice you've got their strict attention.
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Tapping at my chamber door




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The blue state; and the countdown begins


Sacrifice comes after all else has been utilized, after all resorts are worn out, when there's no one else to turn to and no where else to run to. It's pretty similar to praying to God I guess. And the countdown began today when Saniora went to meet with Condi's assistant, Welsh. Is it obvious? Am I deluding myself into thinking that the Lebanese PM's giving up on some of his demands, his country's demands? Is that his white banner? I really hope not, but I have my doubts. Do not give up man. Stick to what you believe in the way many invisible people out there do. They call it the blue condition or state; it's when you're lying inside the ER room, surrounded by strangers dressed up in white, the ones you'd pretend are your guardian angels, injecting you with all sorts of life catalyzing fluids, all worried about what they'll do with your body when you go flat.

Earlier today I was chatting with a cousin of mine about the Lebanese situation and the number, the statistical figure, of the Lebanese deaths and injuries, then he interrupted me to ask 'Do you know how many Lebanese live in Lebanon?'. WTF?!! This isn't 'Who wants to be a millionaire' is it? Cos if it is I'd probably take whatever's left of my dignity and flee the fuck out of here. Well, I just looked at him and said 'I don't really care. All I care to know is the number of Lebanese who are going to live after this war is over.'

I can only say this; before the war on Lebanon, I had no identity. I fooled myself like so many others that I was helpless hence I shouldn't really care, but I was wrong. If good people did nothing, that's evil enough. On the Day I meet my God and He asks me about the things I did to make life better, to hold on to my religion, pull it up on its feet, and march up ahead... I'd like to have something to say. Right now I don't really feel like I want to be an Arab anymore; the idea sickens me. They sold out Lebanon, Iraq... and on national television. I'd rather be Lebanese and die with honor, defending something worth dying for.

I refuse to count. I've always hated mathematics.

I am afraid it is the blue condition dude, I am afraid it is what we hope it isn't. Everyone is breaking down against the mighty power that if we stood against it wouldn't seem that much of a power.

I think they should remember:
من لا تخاف منه لا يخيفك

So I hope it is not time to be all scared and shivering of fear cause if this breaks then God knows who's next and who's after next and so on...

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