The one thing that I hate the most about catching a "common" cold is the way my eyes feel. Some people hate the continuous sneezing, the dry cough, the need for nose blowing in public followed by stranger stares. To me, it's always been the eyes.

Basically, every time I catch a cold, my eyes feel as if they're bound to fall back inside my head, detached from the very tendons that hold them tight. The eye sockets become a big hole, a grave for my eyes to fall into, my inevitable void of sickness.

Smokers would also hate the fact that they're unable to find peace in smoking a ciggie the way they used to. What once was an Indian tribal peace pipe has morphed into merely becoming a necessary nicotine shot for nerves to sustain their strength. Caffeine, being an amphetamine form in nature, doesn't feel like home anymore. Every sip of coffee drags my blood pressure down to the floor. It's settling for sugar free lemon-tea that drives me insane. I used to be a lemon tea addict, back in the days before I gave it up for the sake of caffeine and the Internet; back in the days when I was closer to being normal.

Not to mention the heat.

Not to mention the headaches; the headaches, accompanied by the captivating sensation of depth in my eye sockets; not to mention the way everything sounds like beginning with your own funny voice and ending with your urge for silence, when every phone call and every mouse click sound makes you want to hit something hard… except that you're too weak to do so.

I wish I could install a small camera inside my blood vessels in order to see what my lymphocytes are doing really. I always get the feeling like they need a Thought Police or a Big Brother in order to proceed with their course of action. In the end, they're just employees that need a good smack or a demotion every now and then. I should have hired foreign UN consultants to help restructure my chain of command.

I wish I had more control.

I've always hated medications. Right now I inject my body with Flukit pills, Panadol Extra, Viotic eardrops, Secam for dry cough, lemon tea, mint tasting honey, Visine eye drops, and the list keeps growing. I seek rest in a six hour daily sleep, but then I wake up to a nightmare with me marching a pharmaceutical brigade against all that is viral and microscopic. Ironically, I always lose the battle.

My teeth also tend to disobey my sanity, where my canines and first molars shoot dissatisfactory pulses into my brain. If only I could pull them out and grow new ones when the "common" sickness is due, but sadly we only get one chance when it comes to teeth. We only get one chance when it comes to everything really. It's as if there's always a hidden message inside the sickness that takes hold. Virus couldn't have been wiser.

I should learn more from disease.

Posted by Яαgιи Яαvєи on Friday, September 08, 2006 at 9/08/2006 02:56:00 PM | Permalink